So I have been thinking a lot lately about this adoption and how the Lord has spoken so clearly to us, telling us that adoption is in fact His plan for our family. At the same time, I've had these moments of panic where I freak out and think we're crazy for wanting this. There is a sort-of security in giving birth to children who have the same genetic makeup as you. It's "comfortable" knowing that most likely that child will resemble yourself or your husband in one way or another. For example, knowing that Luke and I are pretty even tempered, laid back people I just always assumed that all of our children would have those qualities...and I liked that idea :). Whereas in an adoptive situation, you have absolutely no idea what youre getting before that child becomes yours (I do realize, that the same could be true with birth children too... but you get the point). So I have had these times of anxiety where I've thought...What if this childs' parents were horrible people...they could be mass murderers for all we know!!! However, just as quickly as these thoughts come, the Lord has reminded me of that very fact that I mentioned above : He has a specific plan for our family. He has hand-picked a child or children that belongs with us, to be a part of the Brosius family. With all of that in mind, I have realized how silly my fears are. He knows that child inside and out. He knows their genetics, and He knows ours. He has, and will continue to fully equip us to parent this child, and will show us how to raise him or her under the Lords' principles. He has promised us good things and all we have to do is be obedient.
Psalms 84:11
For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor; no good thing does He withhold from those whose walk is blameless.